If there's anyone who could use a copy of Dianetics, it’s Prashanth Venkataramanujam.
He moved from Chicago to Los Angeles to do stand-up and make films. But he never considered changing his name which is just poor marketing. These are the kinds of things Tom could teach him if he just accepted our invitation to Sea Org. I mean, who the fuck is going to learn “Venkataramanujam.” Sure, Californians learned how to pronounce “Schwarzenegger.” But Arnold had real talent.
On the other hand, Prashanth has toured colleges, comedy clubs, and performed at comedy festivals all over the country like The Great American Comedy Festival, The Asheville Comedy Festival, Laughing Skull, Laughing Devil, and the Bridgetown Comedy Festival but honestly…who gives a shit. He took 3rd in the 2013 San Francisco Comedy Festival and he actually thought that was an accomplishment.
Then there are the stories he tells which are clearly byproducts of his engrams. His screenplay Pain The Town was accepted into the 2015 Sundance Institute’s New Frontier Lab and his screenplay Ichor into 2015 Tracking Board Competition. Prom, a short film he wrote and produced, is a finalist in the 2016 NYU Tisch First Run Festival.
Like I said, I’ve had my people forward membership invitations to him. Not to the Celebrity Center, of course, because…well the requirement is in the title. To be clear, we don’t actually want him. He would just fulfill a minority quota giving us a tax break. (God the IRS are such cocksuckers)
We take cash, check, Paypal, BitCoin, Apple Pay, Venmo, “Ron”-Bucks, and soon Disney Dollars.